breaking news

Monday 26 December 2011

poll results!

mmm... looks like most people are keeping their hiding places a secret. next poll coming soon. (Percy).

Friday 16 December 2011

lost property office

Found: One Higg's boson. Small-size, purply-green colour. Please claim at the policebirdbox. (from Bill & Bobby).

Sunday 11 December 2011

epipse of the moon

Pip says he took a photosnap of a lunar eclipse last night, but maybe he just got his head in the way.

Thursday 8 December 2011

cinnamon ban

Notice from Bill and Bobby in the policebirdbox.


Please note that as of today, cinnamon is prohibited from being used in apple pies, any kind of danish pastries, or any sweet things, by order of the Spice Council, and ratified (“Is that a real word, Bill?”) by the Spider School Old Boys Knot Club, Strawberryjamshire County Garden Statue Assembly, the Bouncy Castles Trust, the Distinguished Guild of Tarts, and the Association of Villages with Silly or Rude names.

As holder-uppers of the law, it is our duty to do this thingy.

Monday 5 December 2011

snail parade - sluggish movement and trailbacks

The Snail Parade - delays and full stops expected (from Bill & Bobby in the policebirdbox).


Due to the (slowly) ongoing Snail Parade, there will be full stops in some areas for the unforseeable future.



Anyone not wanting to experience pauses, punctuations or long drawn-out passages should avoid these areas.



The Snail Parade lasts for two or three weeks or months or overlaps with next year’s parade, depending on the weather and the excitement.



Anyone needing more detailed information should come to the policebirdbox anytime between lunchtime and teatime (except this afternoon as we are going fishing).

Friday 2 December 2011

refreshments needed

Update from Bill & Bobby: we are still busy at the marsh but we have run out of refreshments. Please bring some sandwiches, biscuits etc. (Preferably not straw and marmalade sandwiches as we have had enough) (broken biscuits are not suitable) (drinks should be hot tea) (no fruit, just in case) (cakes are welcome as long as they do not exceed the icing-tolerance threshold observance order recommendations as itemised in the policebirdforce leaflet amendment 42, section 56, chapter 8, volume 19, appendix 473) (thank you) (actually some cooked rhubarb would be nice) (but no fresh fruit) (if you are determined to bring fresh fruit, or are unable to understand this message, please take the fruit to the policebirdbox and we will scoff it later, when we are back) (if you do intend to deliver fruit, please regard the regulations posted outside the policebirdbox pertaining to cart-parking, stopping, loading/unloading, dropping off, reversing, loud bangs and other noises between what-time and what-time, and all fruit-by-fruit safety procedures - a list of these is posted on the wall somewhere) (thank you) (rhubarb must be in the form of rhubarb and custard, as defined in the policebirdforce handbook on desserts and puddings) (or crumble is yum-yum) (thank you).

Thursday 1 December 2011

marsh

We are surveying a marsh today. If anyone wants to help please come and stand around the edges from 9:00 a.m. to about 4 p.m. (from Bill & Bobby in the policebirdbox).